


Cas Reads The Fault In Our Stars

by QueenHarleyQuinn



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Fluff, M/M, The fault in our stars, Tooth-Rotting Fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-18
Updated: 2014-07-18
Packaged: 2018-02-09 09:21:07
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 698
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1977510
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/QueenHarleyQuinn/pseuds/QueenHarleyQuinn
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dean should know that something is up, because something is always up, and Cas has started saying things that sound like Cas but also sound like something else entirely.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Cas Reads The Fault In Our Stars

**Author's Note:**

> This was written on an IPad so please forgive any errors. Enjoy.

Dean should know that something is up, because something is always up, and Cas has started saying things that sound like Cas but also sound like something else entirely.

It starts with a a word. "Okay?" He would say, like it was a question. But more than that, like it was some sort of code word or had a double meaning or something. And it wasn't even just the word okay, it was when it was used. "Sam found a nest 40 miles south of here. Okay?" Cas would say and then wait and stare. What the hell could he even be waiting for? "Alright" was Dean's response and Cas would seem disappointed.

"Okay" began to drive Dean crazy. The four letters worked their way under Dean's skin and then nested in his veins. He avoided using it at all costs. Everytime the word was spoken, Dean was ready to burst into flames. It's certifiably insane to hate and despise and loathe "okay" so much.

Then with Cas's sudden humanness came the pain quote. Human Cas was depressed for a while because he was no longer useful Angel Cas. Cas would sometimes crawl into Dean's bed and Dean would sometimes sneak into cas's room. It was their secret that Dean kept buried deep, deep, deep inside him and that Cas kept quiet about. And in these clandestine, under the covers, conversations, Cas would say, "That's the thing about pain, it demands to be felt." After their depression update talks (which went something like, "Still feeling fucked up?" _Yeah_ "They got meds to get rid of that shit" _That's the thing about pain, it demands to be felt_ , and that would leave Dean speechless).

And Dean really wants to blame it on the loss and then recovery of Cas's grace because that is some intense shit and probably rattled cas's brain a bit. He wants to blame it on their crazy lives but it feels like it is something else.

Dean is rudely awakened by Sam dropping something on his chest. "Dude!" Dean says with a jolt. He picks up the blue book, which migrated to his lap, and raises an eyebrow. Then he sees that goddamned word. "What the hell is this?"

All Sam says is,"Read it so you can work out your crap." And then he leaves.

Because Sam is a nerd and knows Dean probably won't read all of it, he's dog-eared and highlighted the important parts and things are finally making sense. Once he's done skimming, he looks at the cover again to realize the book is not called Okay Okay but The Fault In Our Stars.

He goes back to page seventy-three and reads the top part over and over until something inside his head just clicks.

"Okay is not our Always." Is the first thing Dean says when he enters Cas's room. He's so glad that Sam is buying groceries (aka rabbit food). "I don't even know if we should have an Always."

Cas is sitting on his bed and, irritatingly, not even shocked by Dean's words or presence. "Why?"

"Cause it's stupid teenage love stuff and we're grown men and Always doesn't even mean anything after a while. Neither does Okay."

"I want an Always...but I want it to mean something," Cas says with determination. Dean knows the whole thing is ridiculous but his whole life is ridiculous. Cas makes him feel ridiculous and nervous but also good. Dean doesn't have much self-worth but Cas rescues him every damn time, making him feel important and brave. So, when Cas wants something, Dean gives it to him.

"Dean?"

Because he's thinking about everything he only responds with, "Hmm?"

"No, that's our Always."

"My name is our Always? That's not going to work." Because that's also ridiculous.

Cas shakes his head, and Dean likes that even though Cas is an angel again he has human traits in there too. "You're supposed to say my name back. Dean?"

He takes a moment to think about it. Always doesn't mean anything and neither does okay. But Cas? Cas means strength and wings and blue eyes and rainy days. Cas means everything. "Cas." Dean nods.


End file.
